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July 1, 2020  |  By Natalia In Blog, Inspirations

I feel ashamed…

Passion Piece - I feel ashamed

[Attention, it’s not the next political post just to heat the atmosphere!]

How many things do you feel ashamed of in your life? If I started enumerating everything I am ashamed of right now, the day and the night wouldn’t be enough to create a mere introduction to the story of my mediocre life. However, today I’m not really going to write about my failures and about everything what didn’t go well in my life. For sure, there will be a better time and a better moment for that.

What am I ashamed of today? I feel ashamed of other people and their choices. It won’t be a political post, as I try to avoid this kind of posts. But we all know that last Sunday the presidential elections were held in Poland, the elections which are of a great importance for all those who want this country to change for the better. For all those who don’t agree with the fact that the government doesn’t respect the society. For all those who don’t give their consent to the government’s selective help which is offered only to some chosen social groups. For all those who say a firm NO to unpunished spreading of the leading party’s propaganda to finally rule the country completely and to have the absolute power, power which will let you look into one direction, not necessarily the one of your own choice.

As I’ve already mentioned before, according to what we have a chance to hear in the belonging to a certain party media, Poland is a country flowing with milk and honey, where a fantastic and good-natured president hears every citizen out. A country, where families are given help, the elderly don’t need to worry about their future. It’s so wonderful, that everyone sitting in the shade of the earlier mentioned benefactor is filled with pride so strongly that these proud people need to unbutton their shirts which are getting tighter and tighter, asking themselves a question whether their clothes have shrunk in the wash or maybe they should have chosen their emoluments more carefully.

On the surface everything seems to be beautiful, families are supported by the country with 500+ (500 zl monthly) per each child, 300+ (300 zl) for the school starter kit, the senior citizens get the 13th pension in the year, the young (up to 26 years old) don’t need to pay taxes. Oh! I have almost forgotten 500+ (500 zl) for covid-19 holidays for kiddies!

I’m 32 years old, I’m relatively happy and satisfied with my life, as relatively as the ideal life of an average Pole presented on the state television. I’m a queen of my life, I work and my diligence is generously rewarded, after the time when the state gets the lion’s share of my income, digging into my pocket so deeply, that even now, I can feel tickling in the part of my body where normally not much light comes in… I keep wondering what to spend my money on, everything that I managed to hide in one of the extra inside pockets from the greedy finger which takes from all, but gives only to the chosen ones.

Last Sunday, when I was on my way for a walk, I was stopped for a little chat by one of my elderly neighbors. She asked me if I had already voted in the elections. I decided to reply her (unfortunately, not thinking much). I said that I hadn’t voted yet, as there’s no one I’d like to vote for. Suddenly, I heard a loud moan and surprise: ‘How come? You are a teacher, you have to fight for our kids!’ My eyes got twice their size, I was thinking frantically to understand what she was really talking about. Teachers are already missionaries, but how come they are fighters, too? That’s something totally new to me! The woman seeing my surprise decided to add that she meant so called 500+. I was a little bit taken aback by her words and I just managed to mutter that ‘I don’t get anything out of this policy…’. It just added fuel to the flames, I was told that ‘You’re young, you will have children. Everyone should have children…’. Here, my vanity took the whole control over me. Right, I’m still young, pretty, all in all I’m quite a nice girl. However, the voice of reason made me focus on the meaning of my interlocutor’s words. Of course, I left my neighbor without saying anything, but I had lots of different thoughts in my head and they didn’t disappear until the end of my Sunday walk. My good mood was ruined, as after the moment when I took comfort in thinking of my age and still being pretty, I realized that I don’t have kids and I may never have them. One could hear some doubt in my thoughts. Where did it come from? I’d like my children to be brought up in a full family, not in the one where mother runs from one work to another one just to make ends meet. I wouldn’t like to be a mother who instead of chatting or helping her children with their homework in the evenings would keep looking for the next Alvaro, dreaming of a man who could possibly become a new daddy for her left at home kids.

But to the point, this text is neither about the unaware of my plans Alvaro nor about my spinsterhood, which got into my skin just like the coal dust into a miner’s skin after another finished shift.

I want to point out the way in which our current government together with the head of our country operate. As I’ve mentioned before, this government chose to be generous just to certain social groups, the ones which can be easily made dependent. Why should one create such dependencies? There’s just one reason, to manipulate people. Who’s easier to handle? A person who is independent and does well in life? Or maybe a person who depends financially on what he or she is given? Of course, everyone who may lose something, and in this case quite a nice sum of money, belongs to the social group which is more prone to manipulation. In this way the state buys the votes of its faithful voters, the unfortunate ones who while adding two plus two get five. What does it really mean? The idea of a state, which supports its citizens is wonderful and the world would be way more beautiful if everyone could count on such a help. Unfortunately, in real life it looks completely different. When the budget is as loose as rotten elastic band in one’s briefs and the pants need to be fastened with a new elastic band which is financed by the citizens of a given country, the one whose budget is fighting to keep its pants in the right place not to reveal the embarrassing truth. This state takes money from everyone by increasing prices, taxes and in a number of different ways, but it is no longer a gentleman when it comes to giving the earlier taken money back, as the money isn’t given back to everyone evenly, oh well some people don’t get anything back. Unfortunately, I’m in a group which doesn’t exist for the state when it shares its goods with the citizens, however, I’m very clearly visible when it collects the new payments, I have never had even a slight chance to hide from its outstretched sinister hand.

Dear citizen! You don’t get anything for free, you get what you earlier paid in, or if you are not too resourceful you get mainly the money which was taken from others. I believe that helping families is really important and should be continued, but should all families get that help?

Dear citizen! I don’t want to finance your kids, as I have my own expenses. I don’t want to pay for your children’s school starter kits, as a great number of students don’t have books in the school where I work and I need to pay for their photocopies out of my own pocket. I don’t want your kids to have happy holidays for my money, especially when I try to save each cent to be able to count on myself and not on the state which won’t give me anything in hard times.

Dear young man! I was once at your age and I made ends meet while paying taxes!

Last but not least, dear senior citizen! You are in the worst situation, as a great majority of elderly people don’t get enough payment after the whole life of hard work! However, let’s think! If you want the state to give money to all the parents, young people and seniors someone needs to work for it. Someone is tricked in order to cover the state’s expenses. My salary hasn’t really been much raised for a long while! The prices are getting higher and higher, I believe that only the ones with the most vivid imagination can predict where it leads us all soon. Maybe I should start investing my money in golden teeth… it’s something that won’t probably be taken away by the state, or will it?

Dear citizen! There’s nothing for free in your life and one day you’ll need to pay for your choices! What am I ashamed of today? I regret the fact that I didn’t vote in the fist ballot and I’m not going to repeat the same mistake twice! We should vote, as it’s the only chance to change something. Only in this way we are able to live with ourselves and to create a better, united and peaceful future.

See you around!

Yours,

Passion Piece

Photos by: Morning Brew, Paweł Czerwiński, Kristina Flour, Arnaud Jaegers, Annie Spratt on Unsplash

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Comments: 12 replies added

  1. Cristina Petrini July 1, 2020 Reply

    I'm following the votes that are taking place in Poland and I admit that your post is really interesting and makes you think a lot.

  2. Mary July 1, 2020 Reply

    This was thought-provoking and I have learned a few things from it.

  3. Amber Myers July 1, 2020 Reply

    Mistakes are lessons! You learned one, so it's okay. It's part of life.

  4. joanna July 1, 2020 Reply

    Everyone should vote, it's a right that our grand-grand-fathers fought hard for. Wasting a vote is not acceptable, even if you don't think any of the candidates is worthy of it. That's the big problem, people always complain about the government but when it's time to vote, they don't go. I am so annoyed on my own country because of this, where people are still bought with bags of flour and sugar, and it's all in the diaspora's hands to make a different with their votes.

  5. Ana De Jesus July 2, 2020 Reply

    I do believe that it is important to vote but I understand when people choose not to if they don't like the candidate's they need to be voting for. Its important to not be ashamed or regret the choices we make but simply learn from them. Thought provoking post.

  6. Latte Lindsay July 2, 2020 Reply

    Voting and politics shape our lives every day, there is nothing wrong with posting something political if it will help make the world a better place.

  7. WorldInEyes July 2, 2020 Reply

    everyone always learn from mistakes, and we make mistake many times to vote wrong candidates but it is the part of democracy ....

  8. norma July 2, 2020 Reply

    What a deep and interesting blog post. It makes you think and makes you want to go deeper into the subject. Thanks for sharing!

  9. CA July 3, 2020 Reply

    We do the best we can at all times. But we do make some bad choices at some points in our lives. What's important is moving forward and deciding to be better every day.

  10. Britt K July 3, 2020 Reply

    I am a firm believer that everyone should make their voice heard when it comes to the elections. Here, if you don't want to support anyone on the ballot you can choose to refuse your vote - meaning that you show up and make it known that you are not giving your support to anyone. Is there an option similar to that for you? Unfortunately, with the way the voting systems work, I feel like we're often forced to choose instead to support the lesser of the evils before us. At least voting for them means that they are one step closer to coming out ahead of the even worse options.

  11. rachel July 4, 2020 Reply

    YES! I've spent most of today making sure people in my country are registered to vote!

  12. Peachy July 4, 2020 Reply

    On the last election I made sure to vote and on the next I am encouraging people to register and vote.

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This blog has been created with the readers in mind, the ones whose passions help them pursuing their success and self-realization … but not only! I’ll also write for those of you who feel that there is a raw potential hidden somewhere inside your true self! I keep learning new things about myself everyday and I try to find new passions which allow me not to get crazy and get away from it all once in a while!

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