A human is a being who has been created to live in the society. Since our childhood we have been taught certain norms which we are supposed to follow. That’s obvious that avoiding others’ company is perceived as a kind of eccentricity or at least lack of savvy, which one should finally get rid of. Have you ever been thinking of people and their influence on your life? If you haven’t had a chance to do so yet, it would be good to have a closer look at your relationships with people who surround you and the impact they have on you as a person. That’s true that humans belong to social creatures, who live, interact and co-create their everyday reality. Some relationships, whether between friends, relatives or partners, have a certain effect on the way we function and on the way we perceive the world around us.
Unfortunately, there are also relationships of toxic nature, which keep devastating our lives and our souls, they destroy all the good existing in us, everything which in different circumstances would surely blossom with a million of colorful flowers, bringing joy not only to us, but also to the ones who decided to share their lives with us. These are toxic people, who suck out our vital energy, torture our souls and bodies, which may finally result in a state of catatonia, the state which lots of you won’t manage to leave without some personal injuries and wounds you won’t be able to heal for years. Despite everything that recovery may follow, it’s good to start a fight for your own happiness and for the right space around oneself, even if the decisions you’ll have to make won’t belong to the easiest ones. As every cloud has a silver lining, after clearing your surroundings out of toxic people everything will get new colors; scentless flowers will change into the most fragrant ones attracting only what’s best for you; black will turn into white; grayness will be filled with the blaze of colors. Your life will turn upside down and you will be ready for everything you can achieve in a totally new reality, the one you’ll create on your own.
How to recognize toxic people? Sometimes it might not be an easy task, however, there are some symptoms, which should make you alert. Remember that you shouldn’t ignore your intuition. You often don’t listen to yourself and to what your heart tells you. That leads you to make poor life decisions, the ones which are really difficult to fix, if you don’t react on time. So what are the characteristics of toxic people?
- Me, me, me! – toxic people seem to believe that the only things which concern them are worth something. They not only focus mostly on themselves, not seeing anything else besides the tip of their nose, but they also force others to pay all their attention to them.
- I deal the cards here! – toxic people love the feeling of power, which they derive from controlling others. That’s why, they try to manipulate, hedge and present reality in a manner making everything go their way.
- That’s for sure your fault! – psychological abuse is certainly not a foreign notion to people who are prone to toxic behavior. They manipulate the reality and they choose the words in a way their victim feels guilty and worthless. In extreme cases they can also abuse others physically.
- I’m the victim! – toxic people are always particularly wronged by fate, everyone else is guilty, but not them. Presenting themselves as victims allows them to catch others’ attention and to be in the spotlight again. What’s more, everyone feels sorry for them.
- You’re amazing … what a moron! – toxic people don’t have sincere intentions in any kind of relationships. They are deprived of empathy, moreover, you can never know what they will really do, as everything depends on what they can win in a given moment.
- That’s not me, that’s the neighbor next door! – toxic people are compulsive liars, they seem to have problems with telling the difference between the reality and the world they created. Most of the times they’ll tell the truth only by mistake.
- You’ve failed again, you can’t do anything well! – toxic people love criticizing everyone and everything. They have their opinions on all possible topics, most of the times not the best ones. They do so to destroy others’ self-confidence and to make them stop believing in their own abilities. Humiliating and judging others makes them be in their element.
- Keep talking! – toxic people don’t listen, they’re not interested in what you have to say. They just want to find the audience for themselves, they are the stars in the spotlight!
- You’ve ruined your life again! – toxic people won’t feel sorry for you, even if they pretend to be concerned with your difficult situation. They love feeling better than others, controlling the situation, and your life misery is just a nutritious food for them!
- There’s nothing, everything is in ashes, ashes, ashes! – toxic people may have a disastrous effect on your life, when you finally wake up from lethargy it may already be too late for you. People who get involved with you without good intentions won’t make your life any better, just on the contrary, they will deprive you of hope, dignity, self-worth, which in turn may lead to depression, neurosis and in extreme cases to homicides under emotional restraint or to suicidal attempts.
Don’t be afraid to say ‘no’ to people who have a negative influence on you as a person. Don’t let them feed on you, don’t allow them to derive your vital energy and strength, which is certainly somewhere there in you, the one which you can use to be successful and to achieve great things! That’s obvious, it won’t be an easy decision to take, and once it’s done there’s no going back, you’ll leave ashes behind you, following the path into the light and building a better tomorrow…
See you around!